exercise for my soul

Last night I went to visit S, a girl who lived with me a couple of years ago, and I enjoyed holding her newborn son who was born a week ago. She’s now almost 20, and almost an adult. I say almost because adulthood requires certain responsibilities that S has avoided up to now. The bittersweet part of the story is our visit took place in skid row. There among the various addicts and mentally ill stood my sweet girl holding her sweet baby boy. Now to be fair I know skid row generally conjures up a certain negative perception of homelessness that involves filth and encampments. However, that wasn’t my experience last night. I’m aware that since I have lived in downtown for so many years I may be desensitized a bit to an appropriate idea of normal, but San Julian, the street next to several of the city’s largest missions, was much cleaner than I have ever seen it with no encampments. We also witnessed a deep level of community and protection among the people who live there, and last night was filled with laughter from all directions. Even still it’s not the place I ever want to see a baby.

I have lived in downtown for a long time, and have seen a lot of crazy things, but this city never ceases to provide a countless number of surreal experiences. At one point we were standing talking on the sidewalk, me, N, S and babe, with several of her friends, when a church youth group came walking through twelve deep, but responding as one. You could tell this was a challenge to their worldview and fear held onto them tight. As they passed, across the street there was a man who picked up a couch from the sidewalk, put it on his head, and ran away with it. Meanwhile the chatter and laughter of our little group never stopped. That is probably why it has taken me so long to figure out that despite the positive upbeat feel of the night I’m very sad. Today a number of my friends are working to try and find S a place to stay that is a little more permanent and healthy for the baby, but until we find a place she’ll be staying on my couch. I guess, for me skid row adjacent is still much better than skid row. More than anything it just helps my heart.